Last night, Lexi and I watched the Jon and Kate Plus 8 season premiere. Hoping the rumors floating around were just malicious gossip, we were disappointed to see the stress. We've watched these kids grow up the last few years, yet now there appears to be serious trouble in the Gosselin home.
Of course, in retrospect, the signs were there. Kate, in her blunt, overbearing way, treated Jon more like wayward hired-hand than a partner. Their styles are opposite - she's detail oriented to the extreme, he's a free spirit. Kate is abrasive, Jon is apologetic. Those qualities are a ticking time bomb in most marriages. Sometimes, love does prevail, but more often resentment quietly builds. As their fame and fortune escalated, Kate was elevated to Momma Goose with her adorable little ones in lock step. Jon was relegated to the background, eventually losing the elements of a man's identity that are important to his self-respect.
Dear Jon:Step up and be the man, husband and father your family deserves. Running away is a cop-out. You've allowed your family to become this train wreck. Yes, you're married to a strong woman, a quality that has most likely come in handy raising eight children, but one that you have fostered and hidden behind. Yes, she's married to a gentle, kind man who just wants everybody to be happy - pleasing others to the extent you've lost yourself.Jon, I encourage you to fight for your wife and children. It will be a change for Kate - she's grown accustomed to leading the charge. You both claim that the kids are your priority - yet there is a very self-centered divide. It doesn't matter who's at fault for what - move forward. Two loving parents are the best gift you can give your kids - find that place again. Work together, communicate, find a loving, respectful solution that makes each of you a whole partner. Get into counseling. Do what it takes.Find yourself Jon - don't waste precious time. Look into the eyes of your children and know where your heart belongs. Fall in love with your wife again. Change what needs to be changed. Be the leader God intended you to be.Sincerely ~ MomUnscripted
I write that because I have a little Kate in me and there have been times in my own life when my headstrong personality gets me into places I don't want to be. I'm married to a good man whose greatest desire is for me to be the happiest woman on earth. That can be a fatal combination when it gets out of balance with daily reality. Kate doesn't need a letter, she needs one word, the same as I often have to remind myself:
RESPECT
I doubt we will continue watching Jon & Kate Plus 8. Gone is the peek into the life of raising multiples - replaced with the tabloid nastiness that destroys families. Behind the reality television show are hurting people - and innocent children. We will be praying for them.
5 of you said...:
I am like Kate in many respects but Jon is a doormat. My husband lets me have my way 90% of the time, but its that 10% that saves us from ending up a train wreck. Jeff balances me and is far from a doormat. Jon, while I like him, does not seem a good match for her. I hope they work things out but Jon is going to have to get some balls and be a husband - which is what all us strong women want. We like a challenge, especially in our partners.
YES. What you said. My hubby says he likes Kate, but he seems to feel sorry for Jon, too. He also thinks Jon needs to grow up. I hope and pray they find their way together again. They really were in love at first, and maybe they can find that again....Such a lovely family.
I am totally like Kate, too, but come on!! Jon wants OUT of this show. He has said it in numerous interviews. It's invasive and they don't have privacy. Not just w/ the cameras all the time, but everywhere they go, they are Jon & Kate plus 8. In her interview in People magazine, Kate says that she will not quit doing the show because she has to provide for her kids. Seriously?? She's a nurse! Work like the rest of us! It may be tight - but join the rest of the country! She acts like Jon is take him or leave him, but the show is non-negotiable. Also, they get $20-$40K per episode. Don't tell me that they have spent every cent and don't have a huge nest egg. And if they have, shame on them. Like I said, I have Kate in me, too, but if it were between the show or my marraige, do I need to answer that, REALLY? I agree that Jon needs to grow up. Quit doing things that are going to bite you later. These two people BOTH need to take responsibility for their own actions and decide what is more important. Don't just give lip service.
I watched it. I think the saddest thing about the show was when Kate said that her kids are happy,healthy,safe,and loved and that's all that matters. What's sad is she thinks that's all that matters. It's not. Like James Dobson (I agree with little that he says, actually, except this) says, it's quantity AND quality of time w/ kids. She admitted that Jon is there all the time and she is not and that her kids called her the babysitters name. Then she said, "But he has help!" That aggrivates me. They have 8 kids. They need help. And lots of it. She takes NO responsibility for anything. Sometimes our husbands do stupid things, GET OVER IT!!!! Do what you need to do to move on. Sometimes we do stupid things. APOLOGIZE!!! She was so hateful to him at the birthday party. I can totally see how she would play the victim, though. I don't know why I'm surprised. I think I will continue to watch to see how it plays out. I hope she decides to stay home w/ her family and realize that she needs to change her behaviors and attitudes, too. Sorry for the ramble. I need my own blog page, I guess.
I don't see how they have laws for children on sitcoms....so many hours and no more, but yet don't have them for shows like this. I clearly think their lives are completely different than what they COULD be all because of the cameras. Can you imagine what the "reunion" show is going to be like in 20+ years? Great letter....you should mail it to him.
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